
HIS RETURN 

A COMEDY 

Opus 5S 



\ 



HIS RETURN 

A COMEDY 

Opus 53 



Pmi^ '(J-U^C^ 






CHARACTERS 

Helen Hartley 
John Hartley 
Sylvia Best 
A Maid 

The Time: The Summer of 1918, 



Copyright, 1922, 
By Peecival Wilde. 



m 23 1922 

©cm 60910 



^\9 



I 



HIS RETURN 

The nicely furnished boudoir in Mrs. Hartley's home 
in a small Northwestern town. There are three doors. 
The central one leads into the hall; that on the right 
into the interior of the house; that on the left into a 
bathroom. There is the furniture one would expect; a 
dressing table, a chaise-longue^ two or three dainty chairs, 
and a pier-glass at one side. On the dressing table are 
two large framed photographs. 

At the rise of the curtain the stage is empty. There 
is a pause. Then there enters John Hartley, a man of 
thirty-five or forty, dressed in a Canadian uniform. 

He is very much excited. He is returning home after 
an absence of years. He enters as if he expects to find 
his wife here. She is not. He is disappointed, but he 
takes visible pleasure in going about the room, identifying 
the many familiar objects which it contains. He stops 
abruptly at the sight of the two portraits on his wife's 
dressing table, one of him, one of her. He takes up her 
picture, deeply affected, and kisses it. 

There is a pause. Then he hears steps coming, and 
straightens up expectantly. 

The maid enters. 
THE MAID (looking at him in surprise) 

How — how did you get in here? 
HARTLEY (smiUng) 

Why, I walked upstairs. 



136 HIS RETURN 



THE MAID 

Yes, yes, I know that. But how did you get into 
the house? I didn't hear the bell ring. 

HARTLEY 

I opened the door. (As she looks her surprise^ he 
shows a latchkey) With this. 
THE MAID (with sudden comprehension) 

0-oh! Then you — you're the master! (Hartley 
nods and smiles) You're Captain Hartley! I'm so 
glad to see you! Why, I've heard all about you, 
and your medals, and being wounded, for three 
years! (TimidUj) Might I — might I shake hands 
with you, Captain.^ 

HARTLEY 

Why, of course! 
[He shakes hands. 
THE MAID (rubbing her hand delightedly) 

I never thought that I'd shake hands with a real 
hero ! 

HARTLEY 

Hero? Bosh! They're all heroes over there! I'm 
just unlucky — wounded — sent home. 

THE MAID 

Nevertheless, the town's mighty proud of you! 

HARTLEY 

Shucks! I don't care about the town! Tell me: 
how is she? 

THE MAID 

The missis? 

[He nods eagerly. The maid starts abruptly, aghast, 
HARTLEY (frightened) 

What is it? What's wrong? 



HIS RETURN 137 



THE MAID 

She doesn't expect you until five o'clock! 
HARTLEY {laughing) 

I took an earlier train. 
THE MAID {dismayed) 

But why did you do that? 

HARTLEY 

Why? Is it so difficult to understand? 

THE MAID 

It was wrong. 

HARTLEY 

Wrong? 

THE MAID 

Don't you see? She wants to be dressed: to look 
her nicest, to receive you. 
HARTLEY {laughing) 
Well, what of that? 

THE MAID 

She'd be simply heartbroken if she knew that you'd 
gotten here, and she wasn't ready! You see, it's — 
it's something very special. 
HARTLEY {beginning to understand) 
Oh, something very special? 
\_The door downstairs is heard to close, 

THE MAID 

Here she is now! 
HARTLEY {delighted) 
Oh! 

THE MAID 

You won't spoil her pleasure? 
HARTLEY {sincerely) 
God forbid! {he goes to the right-hand door) Re- 



138 HIS RETURN 



member — half an hour upstairs will seem almost as 

long as three years over there! 

\^He goes out. The maid waits until she hears approach- 

ing footsteps. Then she, too, goes. There is a pause. 

Then Helen Hartley enters in a street dress. 
HELEN {turning, and calling to a person following her) 

Come right in, Sylvia. 
SYLVIA {entering. She is a pretty, brainless, young girl) 

Mrs. Hartley — 
HELEN {correcting her) 

Helen. 

SYLVIA 

Helen dear, will you do me a favor? 
HELEN {smiling) 
Who's the man? 

SYLVIA 

Your husband. 

HELEN 

What? 

\^She takes of her hat. 

SYLVIA 

May I stay here — till he comes? 
HELEN {shaking her head gently) 
No, dear. 

SYLVIA 

I'm simply dying to meet him! 

HELEN 

Do you want me to tell you a secret? So am I! 
{As Sylvia pouts) I haven't seen him in three years. 

SYLVIA 

I've never seen him at all! 



HIS RETURN 139 



HELEN (simply) 

I'm his wife. . . Child, child, when you've been mar- 
ried as long as I have, you will understand — if — 
if you and the lucky man who gets you love each 
other as dearly as — well, as we do ! 
\^She takes up Hartley's photograph. 

SYLVIA 

Oh, but we will! 

HELEN {smiling^ and petting her) 

That's right ! Be happy ! Be as happy as I have been ! 
{She pauses) There are moments in life that are 
like no other moments. There was one in my life 
when he asked me a question, and I said yes; and 
there was another when we knelt together in church; 
and there was another, but that wasn't so pleasant, 
when I waved good-by to him from the station plat- 
form, when he joined the Canadians three years 
ago — {she pauses) and there will be a wonderful 
moment, a moment for which I have been living 
ever since, when he comes home to me. {Kindly) 
Don't you see? There mustn't be any third person 
here? Just he — and I! 

SYLVIA {contritely) 

I'm so sorry, Mrs. Hartley. 

HELEN {with an abrupt change of manner) 

Now, now! Don't call me Mrs. Hartley! It makes 
me feel so old! Ugh! 

SYLVIA {smiling, and kissing her) 
Helen, dear! 

HELEN 

And don't be so respectful! I don't like it when 
young^girls are so respectful to me; treat me just 



140 HIS RETURN 



as they would their mothers! I'm not old! I'm 
only thir — I'm only — (She breaks off) Well, it's 
nobody's business how old I am, is it? 

SYLVIA 

Of course not ! 

HELEN {slowly) 

Not that there's any secret about it. . . . {She 
smiles at Sylvia) But what I wouldn't give to be 
your age again! (Tapping Sylvia's cheek) It didn't 
take paint to put that color on, did it? 

SYLVIA (embarrassed) 
Oh, Mrs. Hartley! 

HELEN (resignedly) 
There you go again: Mrs. Hartley! (Sighing) I 
suppose it's the right thing, anyhow, isn't it? 

SYLVIA 

You old darling! (Helen vnnces at the word. Sylvia 
picks up her wraps) You want me to go now, don't 
you? 
HELEN (looking at her shrewdly) 
Would you Hke to help me dress? 

SYLVIA 

WouU I? 

HELEN 

Then I'll read you his last letter! 
[_She rings for the maid. 

SYLVIA 

From over there? 
HELEN (shaking her head) 

No; written the moment he landed here — to let me 
know when he'd arrive. 
[,The maid enters. 



HIS RETURN 141 



THE MAID 

Yes, ma*am? 

HELEN 

Bring me the dress. You know which one? 
THE MAID (smiling) 

I know, Mrs. Hartley. 

\^She goes to the clothes closet. 
HELEN (turning to Sylvia) 

The same dress I wore the day I said good-by to 

him at the train! 

SYLVIA 

What a charming idea! 

HELEN (producing a letter) 
His letter suggested it. Listen: "My own dearest 
girl — " (She reads to herself: looks up) No, I 
can't read the beginning. (She reads a little further 
silently) No, I really can't. (She goes ahead) Ah! 
Here's something! 

SYLVIA (with eager anticipation) 
Yes.? 

HELEN (reading) 

"The weather on the trip home was lovely." 

SYLVIA 

How intensely exciting! 

HELEN 

It's not very satisfactory, is it? (By this time the 
maid has changed her shoes. She indicates them) The 
same shoes I wore that day! (She reverts to the letter) 
Ah! 

SYLVIA 

Yes? 



142 HIS RETURN 



HELEN (After an instanfs hesitation) 

I'm going to read this to you. Some day you may 
get letters like it. (She reads) "Do you know what 
image has been in my mind every minute for the last 
three years? Do you know what picture was before 
my eyes as I lay in that shell hole, wounded, ex- 
pecting every instant to be my last? It was your 
face, dear, as the train pulled out of the station, your 
face, dear, and your smile, your smile put on to en- 
courage me, for God knows there was no smile in 
my heart — that day. Every detail is as distinct as 
if you stood before me as I write — the little dress 
you wore: it was always my favorite — {she indi- 
cates the dress in the maid^s hands) — the hat : one 
of the kind that came down over the side of your 
face — {she indicates it) Do you remember how it was 
in the way when — " 

She drops her voice so that it is inaudible, and con- 
tinues. 

SYLVIA 

What was that last, Helen? 

HELEN 

"Every detail; yes, every detail — " 

SYLVIA 

But the hat? What did he say about the hat? 

HELEN 

{Rises. By this time the maid has unhooked her dress) 
This is the hat. Don't you like it? 
[^She thrusts it into Sylvia* s hands, and changes quichly 
into the second dress. 
SYLVIA (putting down the hat, and looking at the dress) 
Do you know, I used to have a dress something like 



HIS RETURN 143 



that? (She watches the maid attempt to hook it up) 
That's not the way to do it! Mayn't I hook you 
up, Helen? 

HELEN 

If you'd Hke to. 

[_She nods to the maid, who goes out 
SYLVIA (taking the maid's place) 

I'll feel that I've had some share in preparing for him! 
HELEN (dreamily) 

His favorite dress ! 
SYLVIA (working very hard: panting) 

Mrs. Hartley! 

HELEN 

Well? 

SYLVIA 

I believe — I beHeve — you've grown stout! 

HELEN 

What? 

SYLVIA 

I can't close more than half of the hooks ! 
HELEN (horrified) 

I never thought of trying it on until to-day! (She 

hurries to the pier glass, followed by Sylvia. She looks: 

then, in horror) Oh-h ! 
SYLVIA (laughing) 

What? 

HELEN 

Oh! Oh! 
SYLVIA 

Helen! Just because you've gotten stout? 

HELEN 

It's not that! Oh, no! It's not that! It's because 



144 HIS RETURN 



I've gotten old! Come here: stand beside me: look 
at yourself next to me! Do you see? . . . It's come! 
It's come! I always knew it would come — not 
gradually, so that I wouldn't know it, but all of a 
sudden, without a moment's notice — all at once! 
It was only three years ago that I said good-by to 
him, and I wore this dress. I was a young wife. 
To-day he's coming home to find me an old woman' 
SYLVIA (frightened) 
Why, Mrs. Hartley, that dress looks very becoming! 

HELEN 

It would — on you. Don't lie to me, please! I've 
Hed to myself enough! I've painted and powdered 
and dined and danced with the youngest of them! 
But it had to come to an end. I knew it had to come 
to an end. But I hoped — how I hoped that it would 
not come to an end before to-day! 

SYLVIA 

Helen, dear — why — why — 

HELEN 

You can't say anything. There's nothing anybody 
can say. / used to say to myself that he'd find me 
as young, as beautiful, as the day I waved good-by 
to him at the station. Now — now I know that will 
never be. (With horror) He'll come home to find 
an old woman sitting opposite him at his own table! 
\_She weeps. 

SYLVIA (nervously, after a pause) 
Helen dear, you can't be over — 

HELEN (interrupting) 

I can't be — but I am. They always are "over!" 
(She pauses) You know, it's not that I care what 



HIS RETURN 145 



other people think: I don't give that for their opin- 
ions! He's the only one that counts. He used to 
love my youth; my freshness — and now, if he wants 
youth and freshness, he'll have to go somewheres 
else to get it! . . . {She shakes her head bitterly) 
Jealous? I have always hated jealous women! But 
to-day I understand : to-day I too am jealous, jealous ! 

SYLVIA 

Mrs. Hartley! 
HELEN (coming to a hysterical calm) 

I don't mean you, child. Of course not! You'll 
pardon me, won't you? Just the excitement — the 
excitement of knowing that he was coming home. 
(She has led the way to the door) You'll go now, Sylvia? 

SYLVLA. 

I'm SO sorry, Mrs. Hartley! 

[^She goes. 
HELEN (closing the door after her) 

So sorry! So sorry! 

\^She laughs bitterly; walks to the dressing table; takes 

up the letter: reads it over again with obviously tragic 

feelings. 
THE MAID (entering) 

Ma'am! 
HELEN (wearily) 

Yes? 

THE MAID 

He's come! 
HELEN (taken aback) 
What? 

THE MAID 

He's just come in! 



146 HIS RETURN 



HELEN (an instant of indecision. Her first impulse is 

to rush to the door) 

Tell him to wait! 
THE MAID (astonished) 

To wait? 

HELEN 

You heard what I said? And come back when youVe 
told him. 

\^The maid goes. Even before she has crossed the 
threshold, Helen has torn off the dress, and flung a 
tcrap around her shoulders. She rushes to the table, 
sits dovm, and begins rubbing off her paint madly. 
The maid reenters. 

HELEN 

Bring me my black and gold! 
THE MAID (astonished) 
Your black and gold? 

HELEN 

And quickly! 

THE MAID 

Yes, ma'am. 

[_She hurries to the closet, and takes out a third gown, 

HELEN 

Put me into it. 

THE MAID 

But I thought — but I thought — 
HELEN (hysterically) 
That I was going to wear the other one? How 
absurd! What on earth made you think that? 
(The maid stares at her, simply dumfounded) Never 
mind. I'm so excited that I don't quite know what 
I'm saying. You can wear the other dress, can't you? 



HIS RETURN 147 



THE MAID (incredulously) 
The blue and white? 

HELEN 

Yes. 

THE MAID 

Yes'm. I can wear it. 

HELEN 

Then take it. It*s yours. 

THE MAID 

Oh, thank you, ma'am. 

HELEN 

Now — I'm ready. Show him in. 
\^The maid goes off with the dress. Immediately she is 
out of sight, Helen rushes off through the left-hand 
door. There is a pause. Then Hartley enters softly. 

HARTLEY 

Helen! Helen dear! (He advances into the room) 
Where are you? Where are you, dear? 
[Helen reenters. She has finished removing every 
vestige of paint and powder from her face. She has 
suddenly become herself — a beautiful woman. 

HARTLEY 

Helen! (They rush into an embrace. Presently) Isn't 
it wonderful to be home again? 

HELEN 

John! 

HARTLEY 

To walk the streets of my own town ! To stand under 
the roof of my own house! 

HELEN 

Is that all, John? 



148 HIS RETURN 



HARTLEY {shaking his head mth a smile) 
No; that isn't all. 

HELEN 

Say it, John! Say it! 

HARTLEY 

To feel your arms around my neck ! To feel your lips 
pressing mine! {He kisses her) Do you realize what 
I've been through for three years? 

HELEN 

We'll try to forget that. 

HARTLEY 

We'll try ! {He holds her off at arm's length) And now ! 

HELEN 

Now! 

HARTLEY 

Let me look at you ! 

HELEN {in a strained voice, after a little pause) 
Well? 

HARTLEY {surprised at her tone) 
What is it? 

HELEN {excitedly) 

Tell me what I know already! Let me say it for you! 
That I've grown old, old, old! {He tries to interrupt. 
She continues without a break) You are not the only 
one who suffered these three years! I suffered! 
God knows how I suffered ! For any reason — for no 
reason — when your letters didn't come — when the 
newspapers told of heavy fighting — when I stayed 
awake all night, worrying my soul out, I suffered, 
I suffered too! 

HARTLEY 

My dear! 



HIS RETURN 149 



HELEN 

Let me finish ! These wrinkles — do you see them? 
These Hnes — they were not here three years ago — 
do you know why I have them? They are for you, 
you, you! It's not the men alone who go through 
hell! It's the women they leave behind them! 
HARTLEY (taking her in his arms violently) 

My dear, dear girl ! How I should love every wrinkle 
in your face — if there were any ! Only there aren't ! 

HELEN 

John! 

HARTLEY 

You old? That is what comes of looking too much 
in your mirror ! A woman is only as old as she looks 
in the eyes of her lover! 
HELEN {almost gasping) 
And I? 

HARTLEY 

I have never seen you look so young, so beautiful, 
so altogether charming! 
HELEN (jpresently) 
John! 

HARTLEY 

Yes? 

HELEN 

Look what I've found! 

HARTLEY 

What? 
HELEN (with childish delight) 

A gray hair — in your moustache! 
HARTLEY (laughing) 

I've grown old, haven't I? (As they separate an 



150 HIS RETURN 



instant, a surprised look comes into his eyes) 
Helen! 

HELEN 

What is it? 
HARTLEY (dapping his hands together) 

By Jove! What a fool I was not to see it! 

HELEN 

See what? 

HAHTLEY 

And after the maid warned me that you had a sur- 
prise in store for me! 

HEL^N (utterly bewildered) 
What is it, John? 

HARTLEY (triumphantly) 

You're wearing the same dress you wore the day you 

saw me off at the station! 

[_She falls into his arms, laughing happily. 



THE CURTAIN FALLS 



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